To understand more about forgiving others, consider whom you actually need to forgive. Is there ill will in your heart toward someone you know who conveniently ducked rather than engaged with you when your loved one died? Do you cherish resentment toward a minister or clergy who was more clinical than pastoral about the death of your loved one, or perhaps who did not show up at all at your time of greatest spiritual need? Are you reluctant to forgive someone, perhaps a friend, who should have followed up, checked on you, and cared more about your grief?