For many, the holiday season is about superficial pleasure and merriment rather than the pursuit of deep spiritual joy. Those who are grieving the death of a loved one may feel tentative, conflicted, or even skeptical about entering into the festivities. We fear that if we participate, somehow our loved one will be lost or forgotten amid the stir of celebration.

Advent is a holy season of waiting. During these days we reflect, meditate, and prepare our hearts for the coming into the world of the promised Messiah.

Because of the rapid succession of holidays—Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s—often November and December feel like a time of prolonged remembrance. Grief intensifies our experience of seasonal events and occasions, whether at home, at school, at work, at church, or in the neighborhood. Wherever we go, whatever we do, there are painful reminders of our loved one.

For some, duty is a legal obligation. For others it is a moral obligation. For others duty is the sacred responsibility inherent in many relationships. Whether we respond to our duty gladly or reluctantly, the demands of duty recur every day like clockwork. Duty is a harsh, unforgiving taskmaster that regiments our life and always demands more. Unless we blatantly choose to neglect it, a sense of duty can be a persistent, compelling distraction in our day-to-day life.

Until that day when our relationship with God becomes that of a different realm, there will be trials, struggles, tests, and temptations in this world. Through the power of grace, we overcome the adversities of life. Through grace, we experience sacred relationship with the God of all grace. There is no circumstance of separation, lost relationship, death, or life that cannot be overcome by the extravagant grace of God.

Sometimes a new perspective on a single word or idea can penetrate our uneven emotions and get our attention in an unexpected way. When this happens, we experience the light bulb effect, the “aha” moment when we understand some deeper truth that gives us insight into the "hidden in plain sight" nature of God that inspires us to grow and move forward in life. This is the message, indeed the affect of the miracle of resurrection that sustains our experience of Easter throughout the year.

During this holy week, when much of the world observes the sacred days of Passover, Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, and Easter, the underlying theology of each event that is commemorated and celebrated centers on the power of death, the intensity of grief, and the hope of redemption.

As we approach the events of Easter during the coming days, we are reminded that forgiveness is the gift of reconciliation with God through the cross, and in forgiveness, there is love, “To the Lord our God belong mercy and forgiveness” (Daniel 9:9).

When spring is in the air, the beauty of nature holds the promise of new life, “for now the winter is past, the rain is over and gone” (Song of Solomon 2:11). Daffodils and tulips emerge from the earth, trees seem to burst into full leaf almost overnight. With every sight and signal that spring is here, we see evidence of the steadfast love and faithfulness of God.

Lent is a time of spiritual introspection and self-examination that leads to the renewal of our faith and a closer relationship with God.

What is the land of hope? Where is the land of hope? How do we pitch our tent in the land of hope when we grieve the death of one we love?

The seasons of nature are an integral part of God’s order in the world. The emotional muscle memory of grief often takes us by surprise. A time, a place, a smell, or an event can trigger our emotions and quickly transport us back to our experience of grief. Whatever the season, the heart remembers—always.